January 7th

Posted: January 7, 2013 in Uncategorized

Dear journal,

I might have to stop working on Mother’s junk stacks for a while. I went through a few today and have gotten to the point where I just want to toss everything onto the curb without sorting it. I have found a couple of useful or interesting things (remember the ball of rubber bands), but the majority of what I’ve looked through so far is junk. It is like she spent every weekend for a year going to yard sales and collecting whatever didn’t sell, just to stack it in the house. I must have enough faith in her to believe that there will be some things worth keeping, and to keep that faith, I’m going to step back. At least I have made a small dent in a couple of the rooms downstairs. I don’t even want to think about going into her old bedroom until I’ve conquered this mess, and at this rate, it will be a very long time before I move into the master bedroom of my own home.

I guess it is sort of my fault, in a way. I did leave this task for over 4 years, somehow feeling like I was going to get in trouble if I moved anything. I’m not a very large girl, so I don’t really need a lot of space. Growing up around all of this junk made me used to dodging it. I think the house will feel huge when I’m done, but I can wait for that.

To take my mind off this hiatus, I popped that old DVD into the player after I got home from work, and enjoyed it over a bowl of leftovers. I did, in fact, enjoy it. It put what our town is going through into an interesting perspective, and it was weird to hear a different accent. Usually when I bother to watch things, they were made here in North America, but I ended up almost wishing I had subtitles for the people running around London. I didn’t really need them – it’s just that I haven’t heard a different way of speaking for a really long time. I don’t know if I have heard a different accent in real life, well, ever. I could see how the movie would be have been a big hit, back in its day, back before it because our reality. It is almost like the writers of “Shaun of the Dead” knew what was going to happen, but didn’t know quite how. I liked how they glossed over that detail at the end, and loved that Shaun got to keep his best friend, even though that would be completely impractical in real life. The Council would have a field day if they caught anyone keeping a zombie. It would just be too dangerous. They aren’t the same person they used to be – they aren’t even a person. They just lust for blood and kill to get it. Once they’ve conquered one victim, they move onto the next. It’s like they have a goal to wipe out every living being, so everyone can be zombies. I wonder what they would do if they succeeded? Would they then kill off all other life forms? Would they turn against each other?

I really don’t know. I try not to think about them too often. I mean, they are such a huge and negative part of our daily lives, but I try to keep them in the back of my brain for the most part. The movie just brought them to the forefront. What do zombies who are trapped in a place with no one to kill do? Do they die? I doubt it, they are already dead. Do they need to keep killing for them to continue their version of life? These aren’t things I had really considered before, and I doubt if I know anyway who knows the answers. All we are really told is they are dangerous, and to defeat them we must destroy the brain. The movie made that perfectly clear. Why hadn’t the movie makers guessed hearts instead? How did they luck into knowing which organ continued to function (all be it in an evil fashion) after they changed?



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